We’ve all been there James! Granted not many of us lived one iota of the bachelor life that James Harden has been living during his incredible run as an NBA player.

(Story starts at 20:51 because there is no way I’m ripping a video of this guy’s podcast on the off chance he stumbles upon this blog)Has anyone in the NBA had a better year than James Harden? Sure Ru…

But it doesn’t matter if you are some schlub blogger like me happy to find a girl that would even consider having sex with you or a strip club legend like James Harden. Sooner or later you will find a young lady that wants to make an honest man out of you or at least cause you to accept her Plus One to a wedding. No matter where your relationship stands, one of the most hopeless feelings in life is watching your girl mosey onto the dance floor while “Lady’s Night” or some other dated girls club song blares over the speakers while you pray to God that she doesn’t walk away with the bouquet because it immediately puts your ass on a hotter seat than what Robert Saleh will be sitting on next season.

As soon as she came out of the scrum with those flowers, James knew his night as toast. He’d have to hear about it from his girl, her friends, maybe her family, and every wise ass NBA fan on the planet. He also knew that the cause of all these new problems was the star of the show during the happiest night of her life and there was NOTHING Harden could do about it. Usually these are the looks Harden reserved for NBA refs once they stopped calling fouls on his opponents because he would jump backwards into them.

There is a chance in a moment of weakness Harden thought about getting married. Because while a James Harden wedding seems like an oxymoron, a James Harden bachelor party would be the things of legends and give us content for months, likely because it will last that long. Besides, taking that long walk down the aisle is probably Harden’s best way of getting a ring anytime soon.

Anyway best of luck James! Hope the cocktail hour was good, “Shout” played in the last hour, and you didn’t spend your Saturday night + Sunday morning in the doghouse.