Liam Payne said staying in One Direction would have ‘k!ll3d’ him: ‘End up a crazy child star who dies at whatever age’

Years before Liam Payne’s tragic death at 31, the singer spoke candidly about his time in One Direction on Jessie Ware’s podcast “Table Manners” in 2019.

Payne said that the boy band, which was formed during “The X Factor,” endured a “mess” of a schedule dealing with sold out tours before an album was ever recorded.

“There’s no stop button,” he told Ware at the time. “You’ve got no control over your life. That’s why I lost complete control of everything.”

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Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik and Louis Tomlinson of One Direction perform during the Z100 Jingle Ball at Madison Square Garden, December 7, 2012. REUTERS
Payne — along with Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson — shot to superstardom in 2010 before they went their separate ways in 2016.

The “Strip That Down” artist found the split “really scary at first,” but happy that it was over.

Payne went on to have a solo career, releasing one album, “LP1,” in 2019 and said he had begun working on a follow-up.

After leaving One Direction, Payne noticed himself struggling to break the habits of partying and over-working that he developed while in the group.

The late artist decided, “You’re either going to end up a crazy child star who dies at whatever age, or you’re going to live life and actually get on with it.”

“I remember getting to therapy and the guy was like ‘What do you like to do?’ I didn’t know,” he recalled.

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One Direction – Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne and Harry Styles One Direction in Sweden, Feb. 2012. Ibl/Shutterstock
However, this wasn’t the first time Payne got candid on his struggles during his boy band years.

He told Men’s Health Australia in 2019 that “it’s difficult when you have the level of fame that we had in the band.”

“There have been a lot of people in trouble with mental health that aren’t really getting the help that they need, and I think that’s a bit of a problem in our industry,” Payne said. “It’s the same s – – t that happens to everyone, that’s been happening since the ’70s. You know what the traps are and if you are lucky enough, like me, to be able to get out of that scenario and back into a sense of normality, then you know it’s a bit different.”

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(From left) X-Factor finalists One Direction members Niall Horan, Harry Styles, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson and Zayn Malik attend the Very.co.uk Christmas Catwalk Show held at Victoria House on November 24 in London, England. WireImage
He said that going on stage and out in public was like “putting the Disney costume on,” confessing: “I was [drunk] quite a lot of the time because there was no other way to get your head around what was going on.”

“I mean, it was fun,” Payne explained. “We had an absolute blast, but there were certain parts of it where it just got a little bit toxic.”

Speaking to Stephen Bartlett on the “Diary of the CEO Podcast” in 2021, he shared, “I was worried how far my rock bottom was going to be. Where’s rock bottom for me? And you would never have seen it. I’m very good at hiding it.”

“I don’t even know if I have hit it yet,” confessed Payne. “I can either make that choice now and pick my last moment as my rock bottom or I can make a whole new low.”

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Liam Payne of One Direction appears on NBC News’ “Today” show. NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty Images
He added that he suffered for years with “social anxiety” and “stress” from fame. Payne went on to note that his mental health was under pressure due to the inability to have the freedom to go anywhere as a a public figure.

“It feels to me, like when we were in the band. The best way to secure us was to lock us in our rooms, and what is in the room? A mini-bar,” he told Bartlett about his struggles with alcohol. “So I had a party-for-one that seemed to carry on for many years of my life, and then you look back at how long you’ve been drinking? And Jesus Christ that’s a long time, even for someone as young as I am.”

There has also been turmoil between the band members over the years, with Payne’s ex-fiancée, Maya Henry, claiming that Malik was the One Direction member who allegedly “threw” her ex “up a wall” during a backstage fight at a concert years ago.

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A selfie video shows former One Direction singer Liam Payne speaking in Sarmiento, Argentina, before his death. via REUTERS
In a TikTok earlier this month, Henry responded to a video from a fan encouraging users on the platform to discuss “who we think threw Liam Payne up a wall.”

“OK, I see this all the time, everywhere,” she replied in the duet video. “I’ve heard this insufferable story so many times, and he told me it was Zayn, so.”

In May 2022, Payne revealed that he got into a spat with one of his fellow One Direction members while on Logan Paul’s “Impaulsive” podcast.

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Musician Liam Payne of One Direction performs at Arrowhead Stadium on July 28, 2015 in Kansas City, Missouri. WireImage

British singer Liam Payne attends the 2018 MTV Video Music Awards at Radio City Music Hall on August 20, 2018 in New York City. AFP via Getty Images
“There was one moment where there was an argument backstage and one member in particular threw me up a wall,” he claimed, choosing not to reveal the identity of his bandmate at the time.

“So I said to him, ‘If you don’t remove those hands, there’s a high likelihood you’ll never use them again.’”

Although Payne did not share what led to their alleged altercation, he noted, “There’s many reasons why I dislike Zayn, and there’s many reasons why I’ll always, always be on his side.”

Payne fell to his death from the third floor of his hotel balcony in Buenos Aires, Argentina on Wednesday.

Medical officials confirmed that the star had a “cranial fracture and extremely serious injuries that led to his immediate death.”

Witnesses told TMZ Payne was acting “erratic” before his sudden passing. He allegedly smashed his laptop in the hotel lobby and was carried back to his room before the fall.

He arrived in Argentina earlier this month to see his former bandmate Horan in concert.

Payne, who was dating influencer Kate Cassidy at the time of his death, shared son Bear, 7, with ex Cheryl Cole. The pair met when she was a judge on his season of “The X Factor.”